It’s the most famous love story ever told. Two young lovers forbidden to pursue love because of their last names.
Despite an ongoing feud between the families of Romeo & Juliet, the two cannot live without each other.
Juliet laments that Romeo’s last name prevents them from sharing their love:
“What’s in a name? A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”
What she means is that if Romeo was anyone other than a Montague, things would be different.
They know that love doesn’t get hung up on last names.
The last time I looked, the divorce rate was over 50% and the majority of women take the last name of their husband, so clearly that’s not a factor in the success of a relationship.
So why then do we put so much weight on last names when it comes to marriage?
Last names don’t dictate how much effort you put into your relationship a year, two years or more down the road after you say “I do”. Last names don’t dictate if you’re willing to work on yourself so you can be a healthy partner to someone else.
So as a guy who has been through a divorce, I’m ambivalent about the last name issue.
Here’s what I am in favor of:
- Taking time to work on your own issues.
- Learning to embrace what you’re grateful for rather than what aggravates you.
- And at the end of the day, curling up with a strong adult beverage and watching a comedy. Laugh, have some fun and don’t worry about who takes which name!